Pause for a moment and take a deep breath. As you exhale, forget about how much you despise your ex. Forget about the petty things you could do to get back at him or her. Forget about alimony, child support, and the new person you have seen them with. Instead, think of the children you had with this person. Focus your thoughts on what is best for them, now that their lives have been permanently changed by the divorce. In the aftermath of the split, you can ensure stability in their lives by putting your own feelings aside and acting in the children’s best interests.
An immediate way to support your children is by sharing the time with them fairly. As you share time with your children with the other parent, you owe it to the children to work out a sensible schedule. This should be a schedule that is consistent and one that you can personally follow, too. A good schedule will make it easier for children to adapt to seeing only one parent at a time. Fifty-fifty may be the best way to divide time with the children if your spouse is equally competent in caring for the children and you can maintain this level of visitation. Under a fifty-fifty split, spouses divide their time with the children equally underneath of a few basic schedules. Ultimately, there is no one-size-fits-all way to divide child visitation time. The best arrangement will depend on what both parents believe is best for the children. And that is why it is essential to put aside your own feelings in a divorce.